One of the many choices that define life
I think I have wonderful friends. They usually will just tell me what they think, straight-up. Single-shot. Regardless I give them my clinical answers, or slightly emotional sides. So, these 10 days, what came across strongly can summed up in a few ways:-
- Independent (though this came in a few forms like strong, hard, has own mind. I believe I heard the term 'even harder after you-know-who' last night from Gwy). Perhaps a little too independent-minded for my own good in their minds.
- Disgustingly logical, though personally I always thought I was disgustingly emotional than logical. But I guess they must be right since more than 1 person said that.
- Between contacting Mr See versus not contacting Mr See during this period, I have the entire spectrum. So it is up to me apparently. But I have heard all sides of the arguments. My friends put up a spirited debate on this.
- The question is not whether I can live without Mr See or not. All of their conclusions point to “Yes, I can live very well without him”, but more of do I want him in my life or not. Whether basically sends me right back to the million-dollar question of “我在乎他吗” Honestly, I do. If I do not, I should not hurt. Indifference will then be my reaction to everything about him. I have another way of framing this pivotal point now, which I think is the angle I will use when brooding over this, namely, “Am I more complete with, or without him”. I know … what sort of question is this? I have no idea how I am going to answer this myself. Sigh.
- I need to start showing my emotional part, if this r/s ever restarts. Right .. like ermm, how does that work? But never mind, that is a IF.
Was there a quote that says “Love is a choice, moment by moment”. Or something like this? Anyhow. That is all it boils to, isn't it. Choices. His choice. My choice. Do I leave it entirely to him? Or I do attempt to do something about it?
What is my choice?
*Brooding*
- Independent (though this came in a few forms like strong, hard, has own mind. I believe I heard the term 'even harder after you-know-who' last night from Gwy). Perhaps a little too independent-minded for my own good in their minds.
- Disgustingly logical, though personally I always thought I was disgustingly emotional than logical. But I guess they must be right since more than 1 person said that.
- Between contacting Mr See versus not contacting Mr See during this period, I have the entire spectrum. So it is up to me apparently. But I have heard all sides of the arguments. My friends put up a spirited debate on this.
- The question is not whether I can live without Mr See or not. All of their conclusions point to “Yes, I can live very well without him”, but more of do I want him in my life or not. Whether basically sends me right back to the million-dollar question of “我在乎他吗” Honestly, I do. If I do not, I should not hurt. Indifference will then be my reaction to everything about him. I have another way of framing this pivotal point now, which I think is the angle I will use when brooding over this, namely, “Am I more complete with, or without him”. I know … what sort of question is this? I have no idea how I am going to answer this myself. Sigh.
- I need to start showing my emotional part, if this r/s ever restarts. Right .. like ermm, how does that work? But never mind, that is a IF.
Was there a quote that says “Love is a choice, moment by moment”. Or something like this? Anyhow. That is all it boils to, isn't it. Choices. His choice. My choice. Do I leave it entirely to him? Or I do attempt to do something about it?
What is my choice?
*Brooding*
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