I read this in an article sometime last month - To be with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be with a woman, you must love her a lot and understand her a little. Then it went to to suggest that a couple should spend (on average) 12-15 hours a week of quality time talking and doing things together to strengthen and keep the relationship healthy.
So it's not routine conversations like answering "how's your day" with "okay" .. or watching telly together while having dinner. Such are stagnant activities that does nothing. Nothing at all.
On that count, only one thought flashed through my mind then.
"We fail miserably on this count".
Perversely, I think my subconscious mind did see the time-out coming. It was just a matter of when. Not will it. 泱 asked if anything would have changed even if Mr See comes to NYC with me. I told her probably not. He would still not have felt deeply why NYC meant what it meant to me.
On this train back to DC from NYC, I see the explosion of autumn colours along the way. Red, yellow, gold, green. All under the dear blue sky. Sunny, shinning. Glorious. Happy.
一个人的纽约。30岁的我。是个好的起点。
当我习惯了懒散，在一个陌生的城市找回了 focus & clarity, 是一个意外的惊喜。
当我习惯了逃避，在这个华丽的城市找回了 persistence & patience, 好久不见。
该怎么做，要什么，该怎么取舍？为自己。
那天（应该是礼拜二），到华尔街游荡。就在它的街角，我坐在一个教堂坟场中。两旁都人来人往，我坐在中央，好平静。我看着那些石碑，笑了。心想“老兄们，你们知不知道你们躺着的这块地多少钱啊。”有点矛盾会吗？金融中心，坟场。金融中心，坟场。靠着边。可这才给了华尔街它的历史味道。Central Park也是。围绕在Central Park的房子公寓都是世界最贵的。Central Park那公园又那么大。所以以前有人建议不然把Central Park平了，全改成公寓不是更好。反正Manhattan的房价那么贵，政府还不好好赚它一笔。然而他们发现，是因为有了Central Park才会有那种房价。没了公园，什么也都不成立。也是有点oxymoron呗。In the land-starved city, the open space is yet the only thing you cannot touch, for it is that which gives the city the flavor and distinction, and value.
矛盾. Oxymoron. Irony.
Life.
我不得不想：那么我的矛盾又是什么呢？That of which I cannot touch or change, for it is that which gives my life flavour, identity, value. What is it that I need to defend it vigorously even if it is an irony at first look?
有意思。
[enroute to DC, passing by Philadelphia]
